What Imagery Best Describes Your Intimate Relationship?
Think about the question for a moment. Would you describe your relationship as an adventurous open air balloon ride drifting freely over a cloud filled sunny sky? Or would a dark room with rusted iron windows bolted shut be an apt description?
Exploring Your Ultimate End-Point
Establishing successful new relationships whether it’s a business or an intimate relationship requires many things including respect, trust, commitment, kindness, open communication and the mutual establishment of boundaries. In an intimate situation, the relationship should be grounded in love.
When you’re totally infatuated with someone, it’s often difficult to carefully analyze things because of all the incredible emotions involved. It’s important to take the time to get to know the person and build a relationship based on trust. You both need to discuss your relationship expectations, and your views of marriage or living together if that’s where things seem to be heading.
Understanding the difference between a healthy open relationship style vs a closed relationship is helpful. Think back to the description of an open air balloon ride vs. the closed room relationship analogy.
An open relationship allows for togetherness, but each person enjoys the freedom to be with close friends and by that we don’t mean many romantic partners (polyamorous). They enjoy hobbies and pursue studies along with activities they love. In an open relationship, you don’t become a carbon copy of the other person which is an impossible objective to begin with.
A closed relationship is one where the couple is so enmeshed after the initial bonding stage that they can’t function as individuals independent of each other. By the way, these two are not the only types of relationship styles.
Closed Relationships
In closed relationships, partners spend too much time together. They stop seeing friends, abandon hobbies, and only do things as a couple. The circle becomes so suffocating that there’s no room for anything or anyone except the couple.
This can be a death blow to any relationship, but it is not hopeless. Counseling can make all the difference.
This case study of two highly educated and successful people fits the closed relationship profile. She works for one of the New York’s most famous fashion designers and he is an IT systems consultant.
She includes him in A List business functions whenever possible. He now expects to be included in everything including an upcoming Barbados photo shoot. There’s no way to justify including him much less the client sponsored travel expenses for a six day shoot. He’s angry and attempts to stop her from going.
It’s extremely difficult to analyze a problematic relationship especially if the situation has been going on for years. Couples need help in discovering new ways to love and communicate.
She enables his need to be babied and is now aware of this mistake. The couples counseling that has been recommended has placed them in a position to solve these issues. This fresh perspective is an important element of couple’s therapy.
With everyone working together, the results are amazing!
Please sign up for your free ebook and blog notifications in the yellow box to the left.
The free ebook explains how your brain and emotions work.
You can also contact Janel directly for a free phone consultation or to set up a counselling appointment:
janel@healingsolutions.ca
604-809-0351
Centrally located downtown Vancouver.