When a father is physically or emotionally absent, the parents frequently can’t form a healthy bond with each other, much less with their children. Frequently, the mother may attempt to bond with the oldest son to satisfy her unmet emotional needs. Subsequently, the son’s self-esteem becomes defined by his mother.
Fortunately, individual therapy and counseling for men’s issues including distorted self-esteem and anxiety due to unhealthy mother/son relationships is very effective in changing lives.
Problems Related to Lack of Boundaries
When the mother/son bond can best be described as oppressive, there is usually an invasion of privacy such as a mother opening and reading her son’s mail, listening in on phone calls, attempting to access computer files, and sharing her son’s medical information and medications with friends without his permission.
Other common inappropriate maternal behavior includes an ongoing critique of her son’s friends and lovers. If the son marries, the mother becomes overly involved in the marriage, the wife’s career and children, etc.
One effective tip about computer and cell phone privacy whether you’re at home or at work is to password protect your computer and devices. This step will establish control and set boundaries for everyone.
The Benefits of Interpersonal Therapy
We can’t change people since the first step to changing behavior and personal outlook is based on an individual decision. What we can do is help guide men as they explore the benefits of therapy and the ultimate changes they are seeking.
When men recognize that lack of mother/son boundaries are the source of their problems, they are able to confront the problem and the damage it causes to their sense of self. Untreated, this situation can become a source of depression, low energy, poor concentration, and social withdrawal. that affects every aspect of their lives.
Fortunately, it has become common and acceptable for men to openly acknowledge and explore interpersonal therapy for men’s issues and unhappiness related to unhealthy relationships. Therapy helps men and boys improve their self-esteem and outlook as they learn new ways of resolving these issues and changing their lives.
Another positive aspect of therapy is that it can help the person get to know themselves better as an individual who is separate from their mother. They can learn that it’s emotionally healthy to be detached from their mother and become their own person. Additionally, they can also learn how to set healthy boundaries with their mothers and still be respectful of her at the same time.
Our approach is based on a positive therapist/patient relationship by working closely together toward common goals. As a result, we have achieved incredible and life changing transformations.
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Centrally located downtown Vancouver.